The First Mistake And The First Lesson

I was in need of money. Didn’t have any cent in my pocket. So I was in a condition when I was ready to come to the client’s house even without the prior taking-coffee-together-in-some-bar ‘interview’ that I usually do. At that moment I was kind of…desperate and didn’t care who and where. The only thing I was thinking of was money. 

Finally I’ve got a call from some man. He had a very deep and low voice. And he was talking slowly. I asked him to meet for a coffee beforehand, but he had some not very clear to me reason not to leave his house. He was speaking Italian and I couldn’t understand everything that he told me. But still over the phone he seemed to be a pretty pleasant person. So I thought “Ok, I will do him.”

We arranged to meet in half an hour. Luckily he lived very close to my place, so I didn’t have to make a ‘trip around the Rome metro’. Fifteen minutes after talking to my client over the phone, I went out. 

So finally I enter the building where my client lives, go up on the second floor and…and I see a veeery-very big obese man who’s standing near the door of his apartment and smiling at me, showing all of his 32 teeth framed with a long shaggy, almost ‘Santa-Clous’ beard. 

The first thought that I had in that moment was “Run!” I was really appalled and wardless. Looking at this man and imagining me having sex with him, made me feel strong, unbearable disgust. I didn’t know what to do…”Ciao, piacere” I got out of myself, trying to smile. And unlike myself, my client was totally relaxed and cheery: “Ciao, X. Finalmeeente! Che piacere! Entra, prego, senti come a casa tua!” 

Well for some reason I let myself enter THAT flat. The first thing that I have seen on the table of te living-room was food. A looot of food. God, he will just explode one day if he goes on like this…The man offered me to sit, but honestly I was even afraid to sit down in this house. I still was thinking how to get out of here in a most tactful way. I couldn’t just say “I’m sorry, man, but you’re too disgusting for me, I can’t have sex with you.” That guy was like 5-6 times bigger than me. And to tell the truth I still wanted to be alive. So I   strenuously was trying to find the perfect excuse to escape. Meanwhile I was brainstorming, my generous customer offered me a piece of cake, that I politely refused. And suddenly here it is! The brilliant idea appeared to me…INSIGHT! 

“Scusami, per favore, appena sono ricordato che ho dimenticato il mio telefono in il bar vicinissimo a casa tua. Ho bisogno tornare e prenderlo. Tornero tra 5 minuti, va bene?” I babbled innocently, telling that I forgot my mobile at the bar nearby and need to go back and take it, but after 5 minutes I’m gonna come back here again.

As I said my client was in a good mood, he was cheery. So of course leerily he told me that there were no problems, that I could take all the time that I need and that he’s waiting for me. Honestly I don’t know if he understood that of course I will not be back. He still seemed full of joy and full of energy for everything. Or maybe he just was an actor better than me…Who knows. I will never know for sure. And actually I’m very happy about it.

As soon as I went out of his apartment I ran away. This man never called me back. And this is a one more thing that makes me happy. 

So having done this mistake, I’ve learnt the first lesson of my job – pleasureseller can’t make any blind deals. Never.

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