So…I forgot him, yes. We were getting in touch by phone a couple of times, but there was nothing special. He told that he would like to see me again, that it was a pleasure for him (of course it was a damn pleasure for him!) and bla-bla. BUT I forgot about him as a man and remembered about him as a client. That’s all. Well…I made myself think like this.
It was a good summer day. I had an interview with a client and after that was strolling about the city. Sometimes, when I want just to relax and feel the real Roman atmosphere, I come to my favorite place in Rome which is not far from my house. It’s a little square with a tiny church. And also there is a fountain which is standing in the center of this ‘piazza’ as Italians say. So I like to sit on the stairs of that fountain and just look at people, observe them, observe how different they are – children, men, women, couples…Or also to observe the way men look at women who are passing by; it’s really interesting and funny to watch. So I was sitting and enjoying the atmosphere of my favorite city without having any unnecessary thoughts in my head. I was in my perfect harmony.
And of course, of course at that perfect moment something had to happen…YES, all of a sudden I saw L walking down the square. He didn’t see me and kept walking his way. Oh my God! Something weird started happening to me. The heart started beating three times faster and I swallowed because of the tention that I felt at once. All I was thinking about at that moment was “I CAN’T LET HIM GO! NO WAY!” So I rushed off and started walking fast in L’s direction. It turned out that he was going to the pharmacy. So…suddenly I needed to go to the pharmacy as well. I didn’t have any clue why the hell I was doing it. It was…an impulse. And I couldn’t control it no matter what I had to forget and what I had to remember about this man. So I entered the pharmacy but of course I didn’t approach him at once (I had to act like our meeting was a total accident). The level of my adrenaline was beyond the limits, but in my appearance I was totally calm and relaxed. And after a leisurely perring at pampers, tampons, pads and different medicines I headed for the cash desk where L was standing in a que. And of course it was a BIG SUPRISE for me to meet him. Seems like for him as well. He was glad to see me. It was obvious. We started talking about different routine stuff, he was very friendly and open and…talkative as usual. After L had bought his medicine, my turn had come as well. “Shit! What to buy?!” I started thinking in panic. All of a sudden I forgot all the names of Italian pills that I used to buy. “Shit! Shit! Shit!” And the first thing that stroke my eye was painkillers for women, during the period. “Perfect! Just what I need!” I thought. “‘Buscofen’, please”. Meanwhile L was waiting for me. So we went out of the pharmacy and stopped near the entrance to talk. I was standing there in front of him, smiling. He was smiling as well and was telling me something, laughing. My knees were shaking, no matter how I tried to calm myself down. “Relax, stupid!” I was telling to myself mentally while I was laughing with him. I was looking at L, was listening to his voice, observing his gestures, his stature, and suddenly I don’t know what happened, but I felt like I literally was hit by a thunderbold. Maybe it’s a banal methaphore but I can’t find any other examples that would describe my condition at that moment in a better way. I felt this vigorous electricity and something hit me from inside in the left part of my body. Damn! I thought such things happen only in movies. I thought it can’t be just like this – bang! bang! and done. But ironically it happened to me. Our third meeting – and he shot me…just there, near the pharmacy. I was totally helpless and weak. The pleasureseller was killed.
BUT of course he couldn’t know about it. So I was putting ALL my efforts not to disclose myself. He was asking me about my other clients, I was telling him some funny stories about them. Also as we had friendly relationship I thought that I could share with him some details of my private life. So having a very happy and joyful expression on my face I told him: “Finally first time in these four months I was taken on a real date by a guy who I liked!!!” And actually it was true, I really had this date and I really liked that guy (but of course not like in THIS case). And actually I could just miss this detail, BUT it was the best way to understand if he cared at least a little bit or not. I needed to see L’s reaction. And his reaction was positive. I mean for me it was positive, maybe for him it was negative. He was looking down and his face was a little bit disarrayed. Aaah! I was rejoycing mentally at that moment. “Means that I touched something inside. Veeery good” I thought.
Then he decided to ask me about the size of my clothes out of the blue. “Hmm…Why would he do that? Is he trying to say that some parts of my body are too big? Or what?” I was mulling over. And on my question “Why do you ask?” I’d got a very unexpected respond: “Don’t break the surprise! I want to make a gift” he said in a little bit shy way. Wow! To tell the truth I was a little bit stunned. I didn’t expect it at all…”Well, ok” I thought, “let’s see what it will be.”
So after talking a little bit more we arranged to meet after a couple of days. When I was saying my “good-bye” and was going to leave he said, staring at me: “Shit! I must admit that you’re in a good shape.” “Well, thank you” I responded having my self esteem been raised to the sky. And he still kept staring at me. “Ahh! I can’t stop looking at you!” “Don’t look at me like this!” I responded laughing. Ahhh…these Italians with their compliments. You know that you don’t have to believe it, but this f**king Italian charisma ruins all the protection!!! So finally we said ‘good bye’ and I went home like that stupid teenage girl, in my euphoria.
After that meeting I was totally insomniac. This damn man was always on my mind. I tried to make myself less excited about all this. I knew that it was not good at all. But those feelings captured me. And I was their prisoner. I couldn’t sleep because of him for three nights…until I met him again.
To be continued…